Conversations with God

אחד

Dear God,

It is not that I need to say,

But my heart is not giving a way,

You are the one who knows it all

(Cause after all you made it all),

Meager is it to converse on me,

When you are the architect of

Each and every one of my cell.

Sometimes whilst I sleep, I see

Lights that blind me with radiance,

I feel my head shake with violence,

I hear the sounds of an ebullient bang,

Then I see me flying like a drop in the night,

A whole world of people join me,

We settle near our homes in a bubble.

Like all dreamers, I wish to know

What it meant? Hope to hear a reply.

With love and account,

A fellow born out of your hand.

שנים

Dearest God,

It is only after I ceased the anxious
Spread of words last time, I realised
I never knew whom to send to
(Never have I known where you live),
This is why I kept it beneath a statue of Christ,
Which I am sure you would have got.

It is to be noted that I never got answers,
Maybe some answers are best when unsaid.

I searched for you in the church,
I hunted you among temples,
I even slithered beneath Buddhist caves,
But all I found were images without life.

Sometimes when I get afraid,
I stubbornly call your name,
But no mountains moved on my word,
Is this because I love you less?

I find truth unfurling like rising dust,
The more it shall rise, the lesser you see.

With love and intense account,
A fellow who loves you more and more.

שלושה

God,

Days where I waited have gone,

Yet, the pursuit for truth continue,

I met people, I saw lives,

I heard unanswered prayers and

Dying saints.

I blaspheme now,

Why do you spread hatred?

Why are people fighting each other?

Why do souls haunt even after death?

Why do they drink and fill their thirst,

Out of the Earth's chopped breast?

Beliefs are meant to change,

And some truths be left unsearched.

While you are asleep behind a fading image,

I shall spread the search onto my mind,

I hope to find you cold and dead,

Cause it is I who made you with my fear,

And I am sure I killed you with my sense.

With the last drops of love,
A fellow who failed to find you.

Four

My dear mind,

What distances should I traverse to find you?

What toils should I receive to taste your essence?

Within the arduous lies you create, I wept

Within the boundless happiness you showered,

I fluttered on unafraid.

When my search for you began I was afraid

Of not finding you, I was afraid I may end

Up monotonously settling back onto normality,

When I tasted your faintest scent, the fear turned,

I was afraid of my cynical knowledge finding you,

Conquering you and crushing you with all its

Idealistic irreverence. But then you stood firm.

Oh, heavenly it is to know little,

My dear dearest mind,

You made me taste the bitter tastes of spree,

Now take my body and possess it,

Devour it with your insurmountable force,

Alter it, rattle it and then kill it.